In order to make our community a healthy and safe place for all, we ask everyone who attends our support groups, workshops, Bible studies, Discord server, and all other TMC programming to abide by the set of rules outlined below. Because we are a growing community, we may update these rules from time to time as new situations arise, and will always include update notes at the bottom of this page. By attending any TMC programming you agree to the following:

General Community Expectations

  1. Always be kind – Love your neighbor as yourself, set the boundaries you need to set to be healthy, and respect the boundaries of others. No name calling, shaming, threatening speech, or intentionally using someone’s wrong name or pronouns, etc. In that same spirit, TMC does not allow “doxing” (posting the personal information of another person without the consent of that individual), or “dogpiling” (encouraging others to publicly attack individuals via social media), or any other form of internet harassment internally or external to the community.

  2. Protect others’ right to self-disclose – Don’t share information about the people you meet in TMC groups outside of the TMC community unless you have their permission, since they may not be “out” as trans or gender-expansive in other parts of their life.

  3. No conversion or evangelism pressure – No staff member, board member, volunteer, or community member is allowed to pressure others to experience or interact with faith the way that they do. You’re also not allowed to belittle or make fun of anyone else’s faith tradition.

Regarding Mental Health, Self-Harm, and Suicide

  • No posts about self-harm, suicide, or suicidal ideation are allowed in the Discord server. If you are currently harming yourself or considering harming yourself, please contact the friendly people at the Crisis Text Line in the US, Canada, or UK; Trans Lifeline in the US and Canada, or Befrienders worldwide, who are skilled and ready to help you!
  • Talking about self-harm, suicide, and suicidal ideation is allowed within support groups, but only after the person sharing provides a verbal content warning, at which time the leader will give any group members who may want to skip this part of the conversation time to mute their sound or take off their headphones. Once the speaker is done sharing, the leader will type in the chat box to let everyone know that it’s safe to turn sound on and come back into the conversation.
  • Talking privately with TMC staff about struggles with self-harm and suicidal ideation is allowed, but because they are not mental health professionals they aren’t able to help you in the ways you need, and will always point you back toward the crisis hotlines and other certified mental health resources. If you choose not to contact these resources despite being in crisis, the TMC staff member has the right to set a communication boundary and stop responding to your messages until you have contacted a mental health professional or helpline. If a TMC staff member chooses to set this boundary they will explain the boundary to you before stopping communication.
  • TMC does not participate in non-consensual active rescue, which means that we will not call the police or emergency services on someone who expresses suicidal thoughts or who we believe may be a danger to themself. This is because emergency calls are most often responded to by police, and we know that transgender and gender-expansive individuals in the United States experience a high rate of abuse and death at the hands of law enforcement. Following the lead of other trans-led organizations like Trans Lifeline, we will only contact local authorities if someone directly asks us to, if there is a credible threat to a third party.

Regarding Substance Use

Note: When the term “illegal substance” is used, that refers to the laws in the country where the community member lives. For the purposes of TMC rules and procedures, cannabis will be considered a legal substance in the United States since this differs by state.

  • Conversations about drug and alcohol addiction and recovery are allowed, but should be prefaced with a content warning. When discussing substance use and recovery in the Discord server, conversation should be covered by the Discord “spoiler” feature. When discussing substance use and recovery in support groups, the person sharing should give a verbal content warning to give others the opportunity to disconnect from audio for the duration of the conversation if needed. Support group leaders will actively facilitate this process.

  • Use of illegal substances, or being under the influence of an illegal substance, is never allowed while participating in any TMC program. Use of legal or illegal drugs, including smoking and vaping, is not allowed while participating in any TMC programming that includes audio or video aspects, including support groups and workshops. This respects the fact that we have people in our community who are in recovery who may be triggered by people using or showing up under the influence of addictive substances. There is no penalty for being under the influence of legal drugs (including alcohol, tobacco, and cannabis) while participating in text-based programming such as the Discord server.

Regarding Financial Stress and Fundraising

  • Posting hosted fundraisers (such as GoFundMe) in Discord is allowed in all channels, but a fundraiser may not be posted more than once a week.

  • In situations where someone is in need of emergency funds, they must speak with TMC staff before posting in the Discord or asking in support group. TMC staff will do their best to connect them to resources and/or emergency funds, and will process all approvals for posts asking for financial support from the TMC community.

  • Direct messaging or otherwise asking individuals in the TMC community for money is not allowed.

Regarding Housing and Homelessness

  • If a member of the community loses their housing and needs help they should reach out to TMC staff, who will do their best to connect them with housing resources, and to make peer-to-peer connections if possible. TMC staff will determine whether a community-wide posting for help is allowed in the circumstances.

  • No one may directly ask individuals in the community for cash for housing. Refer to rules above regarding financial stress.

Regarding Harassment, Discrimination, and Abuse

  • TMC prohibits all sexual harassment, and takes all allegations of sexual harassment on the part of TMC staff, board members, volunteers, or community members seriously. Sexual harassment includes, but is not limited to, making unwanted sexual advances, requests for sexual favors with negative consequences for refusal, sending unwanted sexual content to someone else online, or spreading sexual content of another person without that person’s consent. Anyone who believes that they may have experienced or observed sexual harassment related to TMC should report it via the Community Reporting Form here. No retaliation will be allowed against someone who reports a situation of sexual harassment.

  • TMC prohibits all discrimination based on race, ethnicity, color, creed, religion, sex, gender identity or expression, sexual orientation, national origin, disability, medical condition, age, height, weight, or marital or parental status in our programs, activities, and employment opportunities. Anyone who believes they may have experienced or observed discrimination or harassment based on one or more of these categories within the TMC community should report it via the Community Reporting Form here. No retaliation will be allowed against someone who reports a situation of discrimination or harassment.
  • TMC prohibits all kinds of spiritual abuse, and takes all allegations of spiritual abuse on the part of TMC staff, board members, or volunteers seriously. A general definition of spiritual abuse includes incidents in which someone with actual or perceived spiritual authority uses that authority to manipulate others for the benefit of that individual, or their religious group or organization. Anyone who believes that they may have experienced or observed spiritual abuse related to the TMC community should report it via the Community Reporting Form here. No retaliation will be allowed against someone who reports a situation of discrimination or harassment.

The set of rules above is version 3.0, published on January 24th, 2022, and is currently in use. Version 1.0 was published on October 15th, 2020. A record of the edits to our community rules can viewed by clicking the button below.

View Edit Log